Monetary Merry Go'Round

I'm sure that there is a time in every person's life when they would like the bank to mess up and actually deposit more money into your checking account than should be deposited. That day, for me, was yesterday and was a serious turn of events.

It started when I got off work. I had some things to do like go to the atm and get dog food, which for me is a productive day. I went to an atm across the street from the grocery store and tried to get some money, but as I went through the whole procedure I noticed that there was a lot of wait time, more than usual. And from what I experienced yesterday, wait time is not good if you are at an atm. Wait time either means you don't have any money or your card is going to be eaten up. Extended wait time for me yesterday meant I wasn't getting my card back. I don't mean not having it for a day or two, I'm talking about forever. My card ceased to exist.....as a card, as my card. But to add insult to injury I also didn't get any money. So I sat in my car and reflected on the last 5 minutes of my life and how it had become a waste of my precious time. Not only a waste of time, but I began to think of how to survive without a debit card. I knew it would not be easy.

I gathered myself, untied the rope around my neck, and remembered that I had an atm card from before debit cards were ever invented. I went home to get it, dusted the dust off of it (because I like being somewhat redundant with my rhetoric) and headed to MY bank, where at least I thought my card would be safe to use.

I pulled up to my bank full of glee. I put in my card and experienced the dreaded wait time once again. This time it wasn't money, it wasn't about my card being eaten up, but it was about my card, which wasn't able to be processed. My half-hearted grin turned into an angry scowl and it was the first time in a long time I felt like turning green and growing muscles. But just as I thought nothing could get worse, I called my bank to check my automated account balance (I need more phrases like this one). To my surprise, I learned that my bank account had deposited my paycheck twice. I automatically wanted to say "that's ya'lls bad", but I knew that this mistake probably wouldn't last long. I'm a thousandair for the next couple of days and it feels good......maybe if I could just spend it all before they realize their mistake and take it back. It wouldn't be about greed, it would just be about teaching lessons.