$50 Can Buy You Chaos

Early this morning, Henrico county in Virginia opened its gates to prospective iBook consumers (Apple computer laptops). 1,000 laptops were being sold for $50 a piece so you can imagine how many people were waiting in line, with the hopes of getting their grubby hands on one of the used computers that were being cheaply sold by the Henrico County School District. What ensued was the equivalent to what would happen if 5,500 human beings heard that there was one t-bone steak left on a 3 acre deserted island. People were trampled, baby strollers were broken, and nobody has admitted it yet but I'm sure somebody's underwear was torn. Old people never really had a chance in the race to get the computers and it's probably safe to say that little people were written off from the very beginning.
The event included, a broken stroller, an old man-who relied on a walker-being trampled to the ground, scraped up knees, someone who was treated for a leg injury at the hospital, and 17 people who were treated for heat exhaustion. The only things missing were a blind man, someone in a wheelchair, anybody wearing an oxygen mask, and a circus clown. Five off-duty police officers were on the scene when the gates opened and 70 more had to be called in, 20 of those sported the oh-so-cool riot gear.
If this were a party then I would be the first to say that it was the sweetest party ever, but it was a public event so you'd think that people would know how to conduct themselves. But in mass gatherings, when it comes down to the survival of the fittest, I wouldn't want to be in line with a walker, stroller, or anything else that would prevent me from acting like a primitive ape. I'd carry fruits, nuts, old bread, and raw meat so that I would be able to throw them on the ground while I sprinted to the front. That way the cavepeople would become preoccupied and leave me with a straight shot to the first turnstile. But then again, I'd make sure to bring enough nuts, fruits, old bread, and raw meat for everybody, or they'd fight/trample over people for that too.

The article
If you click on the link, be sure to watch the video. Look at the old dude who is getting passed by everybody (at the beginning of the video). That's gotta suck, lol.